“Hello, you fool, I love you – Come on join the Joyride!” Admit it….when you hear it on the radio, you sing along. “Joyride” by Roxette was tearing up the radio airwaves in 1991 with rocking guitar riffs and “whistling a private tune.” Marie Fredriksson and Per Gessle eased their way onto the radio scene with their smooth voices and sexy spiky hairdos. Roxette enjoyed international success from the mid 1980′s through 1990s. Their first US hit was “It Must Have Been Love” on the Pretty Woman soundtrack in 1990. Their album “Joyride” was released the next summer, and quickly became the song I was always singing to myself.

The Swedish pop duo Roxette became my favorite band when I decided it was not cool to like New Kids On The Block anymore. I was so obsessed, that I actually did my 6th grade country report on Sweden. I remember walking all the way (over a mile!) to Fred Meyer, with my stonewashed denim purse, to buy the Joyride cassette (with my babysitting money, of course) I was thrilled when the cassette inside was bright blue, instead of the usual white, clear, or black casings.The “Joyride” music video was so fun! It made me want to ride on the back of a red Corvette with carnival-esqe leggings and a black leather corset. My favorite song on the album was actually “Fading Like a Flower,” but it never got as popular as “Joyride.” Did you love Roxette too?

Confession: I used to have a crush on George Michael as a tween. I used to have sleepover parties with my 4th and 5th grade friends, and we formed the GM4ever secret fan club – George Michael Forever! We would take markers and make fake tattoos with our GM4ever logo on our arms. And of course, we would stay up late watching MTV and waiting for the jukebox intro and tight jeans panning camera shot of “Faith.” In fact, George Michael may have been the first person that I said “He has a cute butt” about. We were all so heartbroken to find out that George was actually gay, and he would never marry one of us.

A few weeks ago at work, I heard my coworker Dan Richey start crooning “Well I guess it would be nice, if I could touch your body. I know not everybody has got a body like you.” I let out a little squeal, and he asked me what I was laughing at. I told him “I used to LOVE that music video when I was young.” He was a little confused, and said that he didn’t know that he didn’t know the song was that old. I messaged over the link to George Michael’s Faith music video and a few seconds later he started laughing. He quickly messaged a link for Limp Bizkit’s cover of Faith. I had no idea that “Faith” had been covered, but it was the song that kickstarted my recent obsession with listening to 80′s and early 90′s music. “Faith” came on in the car with Rosie the other day, and Rosie knew every single word. Who knew she would love it just like I did?

I stopped breathing for a moment. I thought I was a cool mom listening to cool music.

My parents stopped listening to most of the latest stuff when I was a kid, opting to ignore the pop/punk/new wave of the 80′s and stick with their mellow 70′s singer/songwriters. I love the 70′s singer/songwriters, don’t get me wrong. My parents always seemed to humor me with a few songs from my station before going back to their cassette tapes of James Taylor, America, Carole King, and Crosby Stills Nash and Young. But around the time I was 11, I definitely had acquired my own unique taste in music. It appears that with my daughter, this has come full circle.

Since my musical tastes evolved so much around the time I was Rosie’s age, I decided to share these songs and stories with her. And because I don’t want to forget my early memories of how these songs affected my life, I’ve decided to do a “Flashback” series of posts about music that made a profound impact on me.

After I got past my tweenage obsession with New Kids On The Block, I started to listen to more “alternative pop.” When I couldn’t sleep at night, I’d sneak downstairs to watch videos on VH1 and MTV (back when they focused on music videos, not reality tv.) There were two videos that made lasting impact on me – Tori Amos’ “Silent All These Years” and R.E.M.’s “Losing my Religion.”

R.E.M’s “Out of Time” album was released in 1991, and “Losing My Religion” was their top hit on the album. Previously, most of REM’s radio airplay was done on campus radio stations. “Losing My Religion” launched this alternative rock band into mainstream radio. It was critically acclaimed for their stark and somewhat sacrilegious imagery. However, the phrase “losing my religion” is slang in the southern United States for losing one’s temper or civility. When you get mad, you sometimes lose your religion.

The catchy E minor, A minor, D and G chord structure combined with a folksy mandolin riff and Michael Stipe’s distinct voice became REM’s most popular hit in the US. And it’s my favorite song off of “Out of Time.”

And it’s a song my daughter thinks is pretty cool, even though it came out when I was her age.

It’s time for some head shrinking!

Today’s Topic:

Does the use of Twitter, Facebook, blogs and other social media make us appear more narcissistic than we really are?

It’s been an interesting few weeks for me. In a jumble of health problems, sleep deprivation, writing my story about surviving lung failure, travel, sticking up for a friend and other controversial conversations (not to mention trying to wean myself off caffeine) I’ve been a little more emotional than usual. I’ve had some things I’ve vented to a friend in confidence blow up in my face, and it’s made me do a lot of critical thinking about myself.

I am pretty open about talking about my struggles with ongoing depression on my blog. I am on medication, I read books on self-improvement and I see a therapist. But after a year and a half of teetering on the edge of my sanity, I decided to get a full psychological evaluation. Yep, I’m going there.

I filled out a packet of intake forms, met with a psychologist, then filled out a Scantron form with answers to 250 yes/no questions. They psychologist asked a lot of questions about my support network, past medical and mental health incidents, body image issues, and I feel like I answered openly and honestly. A week later I got an 8 page summary of the psychologist’s impressions and recommendations for me.

Without going into too much detail, I was really surprised to read words like “inflated sense of self, ” “superficially charming,” “immature,” and “exhibitionistic and narcissistic.” I think that everyone has moments where they seem a little more prideful or immature. I know I’m guilty of it, but I think it’s more the exception, not the rule. When my friends talk about me on Twitter, they say these type of things:

In my studies of Dr. Google and Dr. Wikipedia, I realized that there is a spectrum of states of narcissism. When most people think of narcissism, this common and general definition comes to mind:

Some psychoanalysts and writers make a distinction between “healthy narcissism” and “unhealthy narcissism“…the healthy narcissist being someone who has a real sense of self-esteem that can enable them to leave their imprint on the world, but who can also share in the emotional life of others. According to Freud, healthy narcisissm is natural part of the human makeup, but also a characteristic that if taken to extremes can prevent us from having meaningful relationships.

Bearing all this in mind, how do you think that social media affects narcissism? Does it allow the vain to become vainer? Is it a safe place to explore your feelings of self-esteem? Have you had experiences where you’ve made a better/worse first impression on people because of the way you’ve portrayed yourself online? Are you careful to not allow the deeper parts to show in your virtual persona? Do you think that people uninvolved with social media misunderstand the sense of support and community that websites like Twitter and Facebook provide?

I love Twitter. I really do. And most people just don’t “get it” why I spend so much time on Twitter. Compared to other online activities, I actually spend less time than you’d imagine on Twitter. I thought it was high time to explain why my life has been enriched through my interactions on Twitter. After 2+ years on the greatest 140-character microblogging service, I decided to finally “bury my testimony” of Twitter.

Meeting New People: I joined Twitter while I lived in Michigan in 2008. I used it primarily as a blog promotion tool, as well as automatically reposting my Facebook statuses. I had a few real life friends, news sites, travel sites, and healthcare organizations that I followed. In Georgia, I added in a few coworkers and blogging friends. But it wasn’t until I moved to Utah that Twitter clicked for me. I was lonely and wanted to make new friends in the area, and began seeking out local bloggers who were active on Twitter. After following a choice few people, I increased my Twitter usage focus to conversation instead of self-promotion. Within a month of just being me, I went from 250 followers to over 1000. Through these interactions, I have been invited to events and clubs to spend time with my Tweeps in real life. Between Tweetups, Social Media Club of Salt Lake City meetings, blogging brunches, conferences and service projects, I’ve met several hundred of my Twitter friends in real life. Twitter is a tool to interact and introduce, but the real reward has been the friendships I’ve cultivated offline.

Buying and Selling: Whenever I need to make a purchase, I usually check Twitter, Craigslist, and KSL Classifieds. Most of the time, I’ll find what I need on one of these sites. And when I’m selling, I post my listing…then tweet out the link on Twitter. Sometimes when I tweet first, I don’t even have time to post it on a classifieds page before I have an interested buyer. That’s how I’ve sold many items, particularly electronics.

Job opportunities: I like to network professionally through Twitter. When you are friends with great people, chances are that these friends have more friends you’ll want to know. Through my interactions on Twitter, I’ve heard about many work opportunities. It helped me land a part-time summer internship, as well as my full-time current position. I’ve retweeted work opportunities that I thought would be relevant for my friends seeking work. Combined with the integrated tools with Facebook Connect and LinkedIn, you can establish professional bonds prior to submitting a resume.

Easy access to real life events: Birthday Party? Baby Shower? Service Project? Volunteer Opportunities? Conferences? Yep, I’ve heard about all of these through Twitter, and have been able to spread the word to invite more. You can use the site Twtvite to manage your RSVPs and promote your event. Follow the hashtags of people and organizations that you wish to interact with, and chances are that you’ll hear about an event you can attend to increase your network, or just have a dang good fun time.

Instant gratification: Many avid “tweeps” joke that “Twitter killed my blog.” It’s a great distraction from the chaos of the day, and you never know when your thoughts will generate conversation. When you can get immediate feedback via Twitter, sometimes a blog post takes a while to be read and commented on. Really, it’s a social media ADHD dream.  The greatest Twitter users are the ones who communicate with their followers in a timely manner.

A lifeline: Sometimes when I’m having a down day, and I tweet about it, I’ll get replies of sympathy, empathy, and encouragement. On a particularly horrible day, I just needed to know that  somebody out there cared. I had over 50 people reply and tell me why I’m special, loved, and important in their lives. It made SUCH a difference. It’s also allowed me to be there for others who are struggling…whether it be from depression, suicidal feelings, or boredom. I like to joke that Facebook is where you lie to people you know, Twitter is where you’re honest to strangers.

I’ve gained many loyal friends through Twitter, but only because I’ve been influenced by several amazing people who showed me the ropes. If you’re not following these people, please click on their name and follow.

@sahans Stephanie was one of the instrumental friends I made as I tried to get my bearings in the Salt Lake blogging/social media scene. She is a talented and sassy writer at The Daily Blarg. We run into each other often, and she always puts a smile on my face. She rocks the Bumpit and Snuggie like no other. He offers the Twitterverse a large dose of happiness.

@igobydoc “Doc” came to my rescue when I was knee-deep into my Blogger to WordPress conversion. I was losing my mind, and a friend suggested I talk to Doc. He dropped everything to figure out my HTML nightmare. Since then, he’s been one of my greatest friends and allies in social media. He set up Team Awesome Salt Lake Utah (aka #TASLUT). I’m lucky enough to work professionally with him as well, after he gave me the nudge to venture into a new field. He blogs at I Go By Doc and highlights local businesses at Local Joints.

@nakedjen I met Naked Jen before I knew of her online. We were in the same suite at for The Evolution of Women in Social Media Conference in Park City. She’s got a wonderful story about true beauty and femininity, and exudes a power and confidence I admire. As I’ve struggled with body image issues, she’s helped me love and accept myself, despite my physical flaws. Read more about her incredible life at NakedJen.com.

@jylmomif Jyl Johnson-Patee is one of the minds behind the EVO conference, MomItForward.com, and the Tuesday night #GNO parties on Twitter. We met at the Wasatch Woman of the Year awards in January, and she was recruiting help to plan the conference. Although my original assignment of “official blogger” fell through, I was more than happy to help out at the Registration Desk for the event. We bonded at Bloggy Boot Camp in Phoenix, as she plunged into the swimming pool fully-clothed with @TiffanyRom and @Childhood. Wanting to be just like Jyl, I jumped in too. She’s a mover and shaker, and I know big things are in store for her future.

@paco_belle Scott has a keen wit,  good beard,  heart of gold, and a desire to grab a tasty beverage at all times of the day and night. And he gives GREAT hugs. He’s my Proper Drink Run buddy (aka #PDR) He’s a public relations rockstar, and is the man behind the scenes for many businesses and causes. He writes great web content, and is always open to brainstorm my crazy ideas with him. My life is better because I know him.

@joshspeters Josh is one of my social media idols. He co-authored the book Twittfaced and generates great discussion on social media strategy at his blog Shuaism.  He was setting the Salt Lake City social media scene on fire until his recent relocation to the Los Angeles area. Luckily, I travel to LA often, and he’s kind enough to make time to hang out with little ol’ me. He’s got excellent taste in food, and I love getting restaurant tips from him. If you’re feeling a little clueless on how to use twitter, check out his Twitter Cheat Sheet.

@scottcowley Scott is a prime example of an online acquaintance becoming a real life friend. He has a talent for writing and rallying up the masses for causes like bacon and silly cow pictures. He blogs at Scottergories.com.  I joke that Scott is the luckiest guy I know. He’s the winning-est person I know in the blog giveaway scene…not to mention he’s lucky to know me, and I’m lucky to know him (yet I am still looking for the magic dust on his desk that helps him win contests)

I could go on and on about the amazing people I interact with on Twitter. Instead, why don’t you jump in, join the conversation, and gain a testimony of Twitter just as I have?

Who has influenced your life through Twitter?

Top 10 Albums of 2010

1. Arcade Fire – The Suburbs

2. Ben Folds – Lonely Avenue

3. Keane – Night Train

4. Florence and The Machine – Lungs

5. Vampire Weekend – Contra

6. Sarah Bareilles – Kaleidoscope Heart

7. Sufjan Stevens – The Age of Adz

8. OK Go – Of The Blue Colour of the Sky

9. Kings of Leon – Come Around Sundown

10. Maroon 5 – Hands All Over

***
Top 10 Movies I Saw This Year

1: Love and Other Drugs

2. Toy Story 3

3. The Social Network

4. Tron Legacy

5. Scott Pilgrim vs. The World

6. The Black Swan

7. Inception

8. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (part 1)

9. Despicable Me

10. Date Night

***

Most Watched TV Shows of 2010

1. Big Bang Theory

2. How I Met Your Mother

3. 30 Rock

4. Glee

5. Nip/Tuck

6. Californication

7. The IT Crowd

8. Weeds

9.90210

10. The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret

***

Favorite 10 Apps/Websites/Social Networks/Games

1. Twitter

2. Facebook

3. Foursquare

4. WordPress

5. Get Glue

6. Tumblr

7. Beatles Rock Band

8. LinkedIn

9. Will It Blend?

10. Smurfs Village

***

Bonus:

Not-New Bands  that I finally communed with:

1.Radiohead

2. Incubus

3. Oasis

4. The Eels

5. Linkin Park

***

Best 2 Books I Read

1. Hotel On The Corner of Bitter and Sweet

2. The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society

October is my favorite month of the year. Not only does the shift in weather punctuate, the end of the hot, oppressive summer; October is the month that I celebrate my wedding anniversary with my Tayviator. The days and nights are a bipolar mix between needing the heat and air-conditioning on. The leaves on the trees change color, shed their verdant rainment, and bear their naked skeleton for a season. The world becomes more monochromatic, making Spring colors even more delightful.

I love breathing in October, especially in Utah. The air is not too dry, not to cold. It’s crisp. It’s invigorating. It’s great for a few weeks before Jack Frost makes a daily residence, thereby torturing my asthmatic lungs. The precipitation tends to be rainy, which I love. Occasionally a few days of Indian Summer will pop up, but I rarely have to deal with temperatures over 80 degrees. The first dusting of snow happens, as it did yesterday, and the “3 month holiday season” begins.  October is my happy place.

In high school French class, I listened to “Octobre” by Francis Cabrel. Every October since, I’ve listened to this song to get in the mood. Click on the video below, and enjoy the soothing music and voice of “France’s James Taylor.”

Octobre de Francis Cabrel

Forgive me for my recent lack of posting…I’ve been in mourning.

My absolute favorite radio station of all time, 101.9 The End, disappeared off the Salt Lake area airwaves last Wednesday. I had less than an hour of notice before the last songs of Utah’s Rock Alternative played.

I’m a music junkie. I’m a fan of terrestrial radio. I spend ridiculous amounts of time in my car. Good music is a MUST when I drive. Despite my loaded 120 GB iPod, I like me a little sassy bit of radio personality peppered in. I’ve found stations in other states and cities that I’m loyal to (particularly 93.9 The River in Detroit), and thankfully most of them broadcast online. But it was like the air was stolen out of my lungs to have MY STATION lose its DJs and go jockless. And does America need another crappy Gen X radio station? I think not.

O dear Grant Ruby, Cort and Chunga, and all the others at The End who made the world a happier musical place, please accept my devoted love to you. I wish you much success to you in the future. You’ve got a fan for life.

Now excuse me while I begrudgingly reset the preset stations on my car stereo.

UPDATE JANUARY 2011: They’re back on the air!!!