Dear Government,

Dear Government,
All eyes are on the Detroit Automakers request for a multi-billion dollar bailout. I realize this is a huge request, with many long-term consequences either way. However, at this moment I’m requesting another type of bailout in the Detroit region. Help my struggling family for the next month. I just paid my bills- car payment, credit card payment, 2 student loan payments, electricity, daycare, dentist, tithing, car insurance, union dues, internet, cell phone, etc – and the following will just have to wait till the next paycheck. (Which is a terrible way to feel in this holiday season).

If you choose to comply, this is what we need:

$368.17 for student loan #3 (I was able to pay the first 2)
$420.18 for student loan #4
$351.74 for student loan #5
$224.25 for car loan
$51.07 for gas bill (yes, we keep our apartment at a 61 degrees in the winter so our bill is affordable)

Total bailout: $1415.41

And if you’re feeling extra generous, feel free to send $1105 to pay for our moving truck, $500 for our security deposit, and enough to cover our first and last month’s rent. And for good measure, some groceries and a fat gas card for all my traveling.

See! Much easier than $15 billion!


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