Eight years ago today

Current mood: nostalgic

On March 26, 1999…Steve and I were married. We were married 4.5 rollercoaster years, then divorced.

It’s kinda weird to think back on my life with him. It started out okay…we were married in the temple, and came from good backgrounds. We had some good moments and some fun trips, but the bad in our marriage definitely outweighed the good. He made choices that were wrong continually, yet I chose to “stand by my man.” Many moments were shear hell, to be honest. But a woman can only stand so much deceit, abuse, and disappointment. Leaving him (or kicking him out, rather) was the hardest but most rewarding decision I have ever made.

We’ve been divorced 3.5 years, and I’ve been married to Taylor almost 2.5 years now. My time with Steve seems like an eternity ago. It’s amazing to compare the love and adoration I receive in my marriage with Taylor, that was never present with Steve. I feel cherished and understood, and despite the student-husband scenario…I feel like he’s taken good care of me.

Despite the trials I’m going through now, I’m happy. I am confident about myself in a way that I haven’t felt since high school. I’m healthy, I’m feeling spiritually well, and I’ve got a lot going for me. It’s taken a long time for me to heal from the wounds of the Steve years…but I think I’m there. I have some amount of bitterness due to his actions, especially those taken against Rosie…but I have forgiven him. I am sad that he is suffering the consequences of his actions in such a severe way. I’m sad that he didn’t get the help he needed before he became out of control. But I can only be involved so much, and I’m happy that I don’t have to be in contact with him anymore.

Currently listening :
Speak for Yourself
By Imogen Heap
Release date: 01 November, 2005

Bliss

October 8th was wonderful. I had fun getting my hair done with all the ladies, the temple was beautiful, we got great pictures, Chuckarama was….chuckalicious? The reception at Wyatt’s was sooooo fun. It was intimate enough that I had time to talk to all people there, and we were surrounded by people we love. We stayed our first night at the Grand America Hotel (they even upgraded us to a suite) and enjoyed a weekend with each other and ate lots of great food (ie the Melting Pot)

Coming back into reality was hard, since we both had to be back at work on Monday. But we were off Thursday afternoon for California. After a delayed flight, we arrived in Cali and got our rental car. We stayed at the Hilton Anaheim…which we purchased our room off of priceline.com. It was the handicapped suite, which was kinda retro-80’s tacky. At least it was cheap. We became addicted to Starbucks Vanilla bean creme frappucinos. The Cali reception was also great…fewer people than SL but equally warm and enjoyable. Mostly family and ward members. And lots of good presents.

We spent the weekend at Port Hueneme at a timeshare condo. Other than stormy rainy weather, having the beach across the street was wonderful. We ate at a delicious Japanese restaurant several times, and did a little shopping at the nearby factory stores. Monday we went to the LA Temple and Visitors Center, and flew home after In-n-out with Brandon and Aileen. After arriving home near midnight, we were back to work Tuesday.

Marriage isn’t much of an adjustment…other than Taylor hogging the sheets and forgetting to put the toilet seat down…and other “benefits” of marriage, things are about the same….but HAPPIER.

Our task of the week is to find a new car. Taylor’s Bimmer has bitten the dust.