If you thought Deltalina was entertaining, you should check out the new Air New Zealand Safety Video starring Richard Simmons! Air New Zealand is notorious for their saucy safety videos, particularly the one where the crew are dressed in body paint.
If you’re sick of the #RickRoll, how about you do a #RichRoll?
Richard Simmons Air New Zealand Safety Video
Ode to a Certain Irish Airline
No airline is perfect, but a certain Irish airline tends to live up to all these cliches. Enjoy!
Pilots, Patdowns, and Rest Rules
Just wanted to put my two cents in on two aviation topics that are currently in the news: “naked body scanners” at TSA security screenings, and FAA reform of pilot rest rules.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010 is National Opt-Out Day. It is an awareness campaign, cleverly planned for the busiest travel day of the year, to get the attention of lawmakers. Travelers are encouraged to opt-out of Advanced Imaging Technology (AIT, or “naked body scanners“) and request an enhanced manual pat-down. According the the official website:

The other issue under discussion is regarding the FAA’s proposed Flight Time/Duty Time requirements. These new rules allow a reduction in the amount of hours a pilot may have on the ground, while increasing the total hours they may be on duty. Sully Sullenberger, the captain of the “Miracle on the Hudson,” is encouraging the traveling public to lobby to have the proposed rules revised for safety. Please watch the following video, and visit the Coalition of Airline Pilot Association website to create letters to send to your local government officials.
Important Message From Captain Sully Sullenberger
Help keep the friendly skies safe, one pilot at a time!
Phony McPhonerton
Tomorrow (or tonight, or Thursday, who knows?) I’m leaving for New York City. I’m headed to the BlogHer Conference, which I’ve been excited about for MONTHS. Excited but anxious. I’ve read other bloggers’ accounts of their past experiences at the BlogHer concerences, and it seems like it could be a fine combination of awkward, awful, and awesome. I’m excited about the people I’m rooming with. I’m excited to be volunteering. I’m excited for the parties. I’m excited to meet my online friends in person, and reconnect with others I’ve previously met. But I’m worried…I feel like a bit of a phony. A self-proclaimed “blogger” who hasn’t even updated her site in over a month.
It’s been a crazy summer. Between Rosie’s rehearsals and performances in “The Music Man,” Taylor’s commute, and my school, I’ve managed to keep myself very busy. I am frustrated that school is taking so long, and was hoping to be working by now. I was really hoping to be off to NYC with a little more cash in my pocket. I’ve seriously considered not going. It’s hard to go to a big, expensive, unfamiliar place like New York without means to recover from a possible travel disaster. Some plans have already fallen through, partially due to my anxiety-ridden procrastination. As I write this, I’m still scrambling for a place to stay Wednesday night. I could plan on taking the Wednesday night red-eye from SLC…but if I miss the flight I’m hosed. Maybe I’ll try staying with another friend in an east coast city, then hop over to NYC Thursday morning. Who knows?
It’s times like these that I feel like a Phony McPhonerton. What happened to the confident, spontaneous, and blogging Nicole I usually am?
The Graduate: Aviation Professional Pilot
After years of effort, three schools, several majors, student loans, and the blasted algebra class that would never end….Taylor did it! He graduated from Utah Valley University’s Global Aviation Program. He achieved the much-desired Bachelor of Science degree, Aviation Professional Pilot.
It was a little strange to be on UVU’s campus, as Taylor’s program was entirely online (or in the air, if you will). It was a strange feeling. I’m grateful that Taylor was able to obtain this degree so flexibly…completing coursework in Utah, California, Florida, Tennessee, Michigan, and Georgia. Despite hundreds of drivebys of the UVU campus, we didn’t know where anything besides the McKay Events Center. The day before graduation we drove around to look for the Alumni Center where caps and gowns were being distributed…and had to ask a few people where to go.


I’m so proud of Taylor’s accomplishments and drive to complete his degree. He is one of the lucky ones of his fellow aviation graduates to be lucky enough to be working the “dream job” (if you can call being a regional FO a dream). He’s had aviation in his blood, wanted to be a jet pilot since he was 3 years old, and he made it happen.


The Bachelor Finale: Jake and the Skank
“This is the life I’ve always wanted. This is the guy I’ve always wanted. This is the fairy tale I thought I’d never have.”
Vienna Girardi
So…Jake chose Vienna.
Born in Geneva, Florida May, 1986 (23-years old)
Currently resides in Sanford, Florida
Graduated from the University of Central Florida
Bachelor’s degree in Interpersonal Organizational Communication
Member of Kappa Delta
Unemployed
Back before this season of “The Bachelor” started, I was given spoilers for the season from my friends through Pilot Wives Club. I haven’t ever gone into a reality TV season with so much info, but it gave me a chance to watch this season of The Bachelor with a more critical eye. I knew Vienna would win, and I watched her words and actions with a fine-toothed comb.
Vienna Girardi rubbed me the wrong way from the season premiere. She does have a attractive body and spunky personality, but the best descriptive word that flashes in my mind is FAKE! How will she look without the hair extensions and push-up bra? How will he feel about her when she can’t fit into her little booty shorts? She quickly wrapped Jake around her French-manicured little finger. Jake “bonded” with her while bungee jumping, interpreting adrenaline for love. Jake dismissed the warnings about Vienna from the other girls in the house. And if Jake doesn’t end up happy, it’s his own darn fault.
But who knows? Maybe Jake and Vienna WILL have their happily ever after. Being married to a regional pilot in Texas will be much different than the lavish dates and accommodations of St. Lucia. Vienna will love her 15 minutes of fame, but her story will change when Jake is gone over half the month. And that’s if he even goes back to flying “on the line.” She hasn’t yet experienced the disappointment that occurs when Jake gets delayed or extended on trips, when he gets scheduled major holidays and on her birthday.
My prediction? Jake and Vienna won’t last. They’ll enjoy the publicity for a while. They’ll get stalked by the
paparazzi. They’ll plan their lavish wedding. Jake will probably get that Southwest Airlines gig he’s been hoping for, but be stuck on reserve for years. And while Jake is gone, Vienna will get bored and give up on him. Her Zoom-whitened smile will fade and she’ll get bored of being alone on his four-day trips. One or both of them will cheat. And in a few years, she’ll end up like this on a future season of “Reality TV Romances that Didn’t Work Out”.
The Bachelor: Jake’s an Okay Guy
A few weeks ago, I wrote a blog post about Jake Pavelka, AKA “The Bachelor.” I’ve only watched a handful of seasons of The Bachelor, so I knew the basic premise, the cattiness of the girls who “really think they’ve fallen in love,” and the awkward situations that ensue when 25 hot ladies go after one man. With this background, I was really dreading the outcome of the season with Jake as “The Bachelor.” Now that the season is drawing near a resolution (and yes, I do know who ultimately “wins” Jake’s heart), I thought I’ve give an update on my impressions of America’s favorite regional pilot.
I actually think Jake is an okay guy! He is charming, sensitive, and I honestly believe he has integrity. I like that he doesn’t string along the girls he knows he doesn’t have a future with. My gut instinct is that he is proud of his body, and he normally wouldn’t be parading it around like this:
But honestly….I don’t mind looking (and don’t tell my husband!) ABC knows how to get viewers hooked! Now when I hear “On the Wings of Love,” like I did at the grocery store on my birthday, my mind immediately wanders to the above image.
There’s a big of a disconnect between his career as a regional pilot and the glitzy “rich and successful” career that ABC makes him out to have. Actually, my sources at ASA (his regional airline) have told me he hasn’t been flying on the line for quite some time, and he’s awaiting an interview date with Southwest Airlines in March. He flies the CRJ-200 (same as my husband) but most of the shots on the series show the 737 that Jake hopes to fly soon.
My biggest beef of the show continues to be the lack of emphasis Jake’s future partner will experience with his career. He hasn’t said a word about the realities of his time away from home. A pilot’s partner will always have to share their man with Crew Scheduling. He will deal with delays, reserve, domicile changes, and possibly even furloughs. He may be comfortable with his current salary with ASA, but it’s always a paycut to go back to First Officer pay.
But in the meantime, I’m just going to forget about all the IMPORTANT stuff, and focus on the reality TV drama!
Flying Cheap …The Regional Lifestyle?
My pilot wife friend Melissa tipped me off on this upcoming Frontline special: Flying Cheap
Quoting the Frontline website:
From producer Rick Young —
The crash of Continental 3407 outside Buffalo last year, killing all on board, was big news, as any commercial crash is. But like many who were fortunate enough not to be touched personally by the tragedy, what most caught my attention was the news that followed. The co-pilot had been making less than $16,000.
While I knew the airline industry had been struggling through tough times since 9/11, I sure didn’t know that some of the folks that fly me around are working second jobs and overnighting on lounge room La-Z-Boys. And I didn’t know that regional airlines, once thought of as puddle-jumpers, had grown so fast that they now account for more than half the nation’s daily departures. We are on our way to becoming a regional airline nation.
If you missed this big industry shift, that’s understandable. Most flights today still carry the codes and colors of the major airlines. But over the past decade, fewer and fewer of the majors are actually flying those planes. That job is increasingly outsourced to small regional companies with names most of us hardly know. Continental 3407 wasn’t flown by Continental, but by a company called Colgan Air.
The rapid growth of airline outsourcing is part of a fiercely competitive industry that keeps airfares affordable for many. And that’s good for consumers. But the crash of 3407, and the year-long investigation that has followed, raised significant questions about the safety practices of regional operators like Colgan. So it seemed a good time for FRONTLINE to journey into the world of the regionals and see what the insiders had to say.
In this clip from the film, you’ll hear about the lives of regional pilots, crash pads and the pressures that outsourcing brings to bear — “pilot pushing” as its called in the industry. Two former Colgan pilots agreed to speak publicly for the first time, and so we flew to California and sat down for long, amazing interviews. While their stories were in many ways surprising, we knew they weren’t unique. We’ve spoken with many regional pilots, both former and current, and most all shared similar concerns about what’s happening in the airline industry.
The full expose will be showing on February 9th. But even from this 10 minute snippet, you’ll see and hear some pretty harrowing facts…poverty wages for newbie first officers, crazy crowded crashpad conditions, the realities of duty time vs paid flight time, company efficiency quotas, the reasons why so many people commute. I’m a little perturbed that the video infers that all regional pilots are low time and underexperienced…but that’s a pretty common media angle.
It will be interesting to see if the special mentions anything about pilot families, and how the commuting lifestyle affects family life. I don’t deal with the physical fatigue my husband experiences after his fourth 16-hour day in a row, but to say I’m immune from emotional fatigue would be false. I do know the existing duty FAA guidelines are currently under revision, and things can’t stay at the status quo much longer. And this includes bargain-basement airfare.
And now for some light entertainment…
Skymall Birthday Wishlist

I love to shop, but not in the traditional “Let’s go to the mall and have a girly shopping spree heyday” kind of shopping. As soon as I was old enough to help my mom clip coupons, I gained mad discount bargain shopping skills. I am true to my brand loyalties, despite buying most of my stuff at discount retailers and thrift stores. Growing up, I was a sucker for the “As Seen On TV” commercial products (I still am, if the recently acquired SlapChop in my cupboard is any indication). I’ve been shopping online since the late 1990′s, and get better prices on the things I do buy that way. Although I don’t do much shopping from catalogs, I have had a longtime guilty pleasure obsession with SkyMall Magazine.
Nothing produces a case of the “Gimmes” more than Skymall. It’s a brilliant airline marketing tactic…fill 136 pages with exciting and unique products, and provide each passenger with a copy at arm’s length. I usually ban myself from even pulling the magazine out of my seatback pocket, knowing that I will launch into greedy materialistic consumer mode before I hit 10,000′ altitude. But on my flight back from Memphis this weekend, I indulged in a little SkyMall fantasizing. In honor of my upcoming 30th birthday (in 17 days), here is my Skymall wishlist:




















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